anyway.. my weeKend was spending time with my faMiLy and Shah.. likE shah & i went to CourTs to look for our new HP... and it cost a bomb.. but i love it lotZ... and later we talk things out..
I just can'T help to just be hurt.. cry.. and upset... we have been so long together and it's so hard if we ought to let go... haiZ...
what can i do when i have that feelings.... i just can't let him go that easily... it's so hard for me to get over it :'(... anD it'S haRd for him to get over me.. how i know? shah told me...
we talk bout our relationship.. and i know that i've been naughty towards him as in at time i could be so stubborn and step over his head without realising it... maybe the fight is worth it as it will make us stronger and changes for the better.. right? :)
shah also told me like this girl LOVE him...
as in LOVE LOVE him... and that girl would even wait for SHAH...
seriously, if you were in my shoes.. what would you feeL?
this is what i do when shah told me that... i just burst out crying with tears... as it hurts so bad...
EVEnTHOUGH he told me the truth and told the girl that his attached with me... but still i'm just hurt and scared... and my paranoid thinking start to kick in... I just have to get over it even how much it hurts me till today :'(
and the worst think.. everytime i think about it.. my heart is like beating so fast as if it will anytime jump out.. and it really hurts me... i'm 1/4 heatbroken... and yup i'm very much hurting and crying so much in my heart now :'(
"dear god.. please cure my heart as i still want to live my life... please remove this pain from my heart away as i really love him but i am not strong enough to be hurt by him.. heartbroken or loose him.... please god i'm really sick now as everynight when i wanna go to bed, i will cry and my heart start to beat so fast.... i keep having fever and headache... please god i beg you... this time around i really need you by my side"
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